Reconciliation or Divorce in the New Year?
I encourage parties to pursue reconciliation of their marriage with a good marriage counselor. A counselor that “fits” both parties’ needs is ideal. Sometimes it takes several sessions to determine if a counselor will be a good choice for a couple. If not, be willing to go to another counselor until you find the right counselor for you as a couple. It’s not a good sign if one spouse states that they will go to counseling to “support” the other party because it indicates that spouses’ unwillingness to address their own issues or to take responsibility for their part for the problems in the marriage. Many marriages deteriorate beyond repair due to addictions, infidelity, unwillingness to address intimacy issues/lack thereof.
Consider the possibility of your new life after divorce. What opportunities might be afforded to you? Could it relieve stress for your children, whether they be young or adults? Have they asked for you to divorce your spouse? Might there be liberation, joy, new journeys, and new relationships for you to pursue after a divorce? Are you ready to be set free from a spouse who is dishonest, demeaning, lies to you, abuses you (emotionally and/or physically) or hides community assets and debts?
Many clients have found great relief in finally making the difficult decision to divorce. The divorce process does not have to be contentious. Mediation (with a mediator who has a law degree) and collaborative law offer more amicable methods for finalizing a divorce.
If you are considering divorce, sleepless nights worrying about unanswered questions, can be minimized when you understand the process to move forward.
Consult with an experienced family law attorney to understand the divorce process.
“There are only two days in the year that nothing can be done. One is called yesterday
and the other is called tomorrow, so today is the right day to do, decide and move forward.
You are the only one that can do this for you.”